Lesson 32 - Are you experiencing a financial blackout?

Experiencing a financial blackout these days in our instant gratification society is something that is actually quite normal. 

A financial blackout is similar to a blackout someone might experience with alcohol or drugs, but in the context of money. It's a state where you lose control or awareness of your financial decisions—spending or making financial decisions without fully being conscious and present of the consequences until you "come to" and realize the damage.

Here are some examples of a financial blackout:

Mindless Spending

During a financial blackout, you might spend money in a daze, whether it's shopping online or in person. You’re not fully aware of how much you’re spending, what you are buying or why.

Waking Up to the Aftermath

Once you "snap out of it," you often will feel shocked, confused, or panicked when you look at your bank balance, credit card statements, or see a pile of shopping bags. It can feel like a fog lifts, and they suddenly realize how much money is gone.

Emotional Triggers

Financial blackouts are often triggered by emotions like stress, boredom, anxiety, or sadness. Spending becomes a way to numb those feelings, but because it's done mindlessly, it leads to a loss of control over finances.

Feeling Disconnected

If you are in a financial blackout you feel disconnected from your own actions. It’s like you’re watching yourself spend but aren’t fully present. There’s no real thought about the long-term impact of what you’re doing in the moment. 

Guilt and Shame Afterwards

Once you come out of the blackout, there’s usually a flood of emotions like guilt, shame, or regret. You might beat yourself up for not being able to stop or for letting it happen again.

Loss of Memory About Spending

Sometimes, when in a financial blackout you might not even remember what you bought or where the money went. You might check your accounts and be shocked by shopping that happened that you don’t even remember. 

No Budget or Limits

When you're in this state,you’re not thinking about your spending plan, budget limits, or consequences. It’s all about the immediate gratification or the temporary escape from the uncomfortable emotions.

Trying to “snap out” of your financial blackout can feel really hard. 

Overall money can feel really hard. 

The key to breaking the financial blackout is awareness, just like quitting alcohol or drugs. 

Understanding that this has become a problem is a HUGE step towards financial sobriety. This means that you are aware that something isn’t working for you anymore. 

Here are some suggestions that I have to break out of a financial blackout: 

 Ask yourself, what was really going on? 

 Financial blackouts are mostly driven by emotions. It is important to understand what you were actually feeling or commit to checking in with your emotions more. Feel the emotions, don’t push them away back into the dark hole. Feel them, journal about them. What is really going on?

Take a Deep Breath

Breathing deeply helps calm the nervous system, which can reduce the emotional pull that leads to blackout spending. Slowing down their breathing gives them a moment to reset mentally and emotionally. Honour that it feels hard but it's so important to connect with your body to start to establish the body/mind connection. 

Acknowledge what happened 

 This might be a time when you look at the balances on your credit cards and your bank accounts. What happened while you were in your financial blackout? This is the step that can really bring up the feelings of shame and guilt. Try to do this step without any judgement. Acknowledging that you were in a blackout and want to do better is a great step towards acceptance. 

Create action steps

Now that you are present, conscious and mindful of what has happened you can start to plan some action steps on what to do next. Should you return some items? Lock or freeze your credit cards? Remove credit cards from your wallet? Remove credit cards from your online shopping sites? Unsubscribe from marketing emails? Starting to take INTENTIONAL steps to avoid another blackout will start the forward motion to make peace with some of your actions. 

Seek support

Community and support in any recovery is vital! “The opposite of addiction is connection.” - Johann Hari is one of my favourite quotes when it comes to healing. Community can look like talking to a trusted friend about what happened, maybe going to a gathering (She Recovers has gatherings twice a day, info can be found here: https://sherecovers.org/together-online/) , sitting in a circle with other women and speak your truth. Shame starts to dissolve when we give it a voice. 

Create awareness

Start to create daily habits to check in with yourself and how you are feelings, check in with emotions and practice mindfulness. This is what I call sober spending. When we are sober spending we are focusing on making mindful, clear, conscious present decisions with our money. I have a free 3 day sober spending course you can access here: https://www.lindaparmar.com/soberspending. 

It is not the easiest thing to recognize that things went sideways with our spending. I often think of things that bring us to a place of wanting to do better is the BEST LESSON WE CAN LEARN. Your financial blackout can be a turning point in your Financial Sobriety. 

I see you. You and your money matter to me. You’ve got this. 

All the money love sent your way, 

Linda Parmar

Financial Sobriety Expert